


Invader Zim meets Voltar

by Ben10aliendragon



Category: Invader Zim, League of Super Evil
Genre: Invader Zim Crossover League of Super Evil, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-14 19:12:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5754964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ben10aliendragon/pseuds/Ben10aliendragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What Happens when Zim and Voltar meet?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Meeting

It is early morning and Zim’s ship lies in ruin where the Metrotown Park statue once stood.  
Zim: Curse those evil death bees for crashing my ship again! No matter I will just get my tow vehicle and retrieve it just like last time. I just hope those crazy people don’t find my ship again. Now to get back to the base without being noticed!  
Meanwhile just outside of Voltar’s uncaring nemesis Steve’s house, Voltar is putting the finishing touches on his latest plan.  
Voltar: Muhaha!!! Time to unleash my evilest scheme yet!  
Voltar Rings the door bell, quickly jumping behind one of Steve’s bushes.  
Steve: Just a minute!  
Voltar giggles while Steve opens the door to see that no one is there.  
Steve: Kids and their jokes! It is a good thing I don’t care.  
Steve starts to head back inside but find himself stuck.  
Voltar (Jumping out): Take that Steve! I put glue on your doorstep! Muhaha!!!  
Steve: I don’t care.  
Voltar runs over to the next house still looking at Steve while Zim runs from place to place in fear of being seen without his disguise. Zim and Voltar crash into each other in surprise.  
Voltar: Hey! Watch where you’re going you… Hey you look like me!  
Zim: Oh no! I’ve been seen! Hey wait a minute you look like an Irken! Who are you?  
Voltar: Muhaha! I am The Great Voltar and soon to be ruler of the neighbourhood! Who are you?  
Zim: I am ah… (Well I can’t tell him I am an alien bent on destroying the world; it might blow my ingenuous cover!! Then again this guy sounds crazy like the Dib. Hmm… What to do?) I am a villain too and my name is ah… Bugman! The... eh... Angry!  
Voltar: Well Bugman I have never heard of you. Maybe you can join The League of Super Evil in our quest for Neighbourhood domination!  
Zim: Well that sounds great and all but…  
Voltar starts dragging Zim toward his lair.  
Zim: Unhand me! Unhand Zim!  
Voltar: Zim?  
Zim: Ah did I say Zim? I meant Bugman! Yes. Unhand Bugman.  
Voltar: … OK, well were here! This is The Lair!  
Zim and Voltar stand in front of an oddly shaped house, mostly made up of a metal skull with a red tinted window for an eye. Above the skull sits a crows-nest like tower.  
Zim: As I said before I should…  
Voltar: Come on in, I’ll give you a tour.  
Zim: (Hmm, this might work. Maybe if I gain this ‘Voltar’s’ trust he could prove useful as an ally. I mean he is into domination but he should set the bar a little higher.) So Voltar why are you trying to rule the neighbourhood?  
Voltar: Because I am a villain and that is what villains do, that and if I rule this neighbourhood Steve will have to care! You hear that Steve?!  
Steve: I still don’t care!  
Voltar: So why do you ask anyway Bugman? Are you having second thoughts about becoming a loser?  
Zim: (Man this guy is nuts!) No… No of course not. Don’t be silly. I just was wondering if you would be interested in taking your domination plans up a notch.  
Voltar: What? You mean rule the city?  
Zim: More like the world!? (Laughs evilly)  
Voltar: The world of course! Steve will have no choice but to care if I rule the world! Muhaha!  
Zim: We…  
Voltar: That’s what I said, we.  
Zim: So the lair…  
Voltar: Right!  
Voltar Opens the door and lets Zim in.  
Frogg is alone watching something on TV when Voltar and Zim enter. He looks away from the screen expecting only to see Voltar but is surprised when he notices Zim with him.  
Frogg: So ah… Voltar, who’s your friend?  
Voltar: This is Bugman, the newest member of the League of Super Evil! Bugman, this is Doktor Frogg.  
Zim: Hello.  
Frogg: Newest member!? Ah Voltar can I talk to you for a second?  
Frogg pulls Voltar aside.  
Frogg: Are you sure we can trust him? What if he turns out to be bad news like that evil kid or an obstacle like gene?!  
Voltar: Relax Frogg. He looks trustworthy enough.  
Frogg: Are you sure it doesn’t have to do with his similarity to you?  
Voltar: No…  
Frogg: I just think we should keep an eye on him.  
Voltar: You worry too much Frogg.  
Frogg (To himself): I have a sinking feeling that this won’t end well.  
Voltar: Now let me introduce you to Red and Doomageddon. Red!? Doomageddon!?  
Doomageddon teleports in next to Doktor Frogg and begins trying to eat him.  
Frogg: Bad Doomageddon! I am not a chew toy!  
Doomageddon swallows Frogg and laughs smugly. Meanwhile Red rushes in from the hall with toilet paper stuck to his foot.  
Red: What is it Voltar? Do you need me to open the glue for you again?  
Voltar: Red! You’re embarrassing me!  
Red: Sorry Voltar.  
Voltar (Pointing at Red): So this is Red. Red! You have toilet paper stuck to your foot again!  
Red blushes and pulls the toilet paper off his foot.  
Voltar (Pointing at Doomageddon now): And the pan dimensional doom hound eating Doktor Frogg is Doomageddon.  
Doomageddon spits out Doktor Frogg.  
Frogg (Getting up): Argh. Why do you keep eating me?!  
Doomageddon smiles at Frogg and laughs again.  
Zim: Wow an actual doom hound! I thought they went extinct. (Man this nut has quite a big team and all I have is Mini Moose and my stupid robot Gir.)  
Voltar: Oh I almost forgot the henchbots. Henchbots!!  
The henchbots enter the room the same way Red did earlier and make their way over to Voltar who is currently pointing at them. They get about halfway to Voltar before falling apart and landing in a heap.  
Zim: You have quite the team Voltar; I myself only have a stupid robot named Gir and an obedient robot Moose named Mini Moose!  
Voltar: I would love to see you lair and meet your henchmen Bugman.  
Zim (paranoid): You want to see my base. Um… (Oh should I show them? Should I? Well their ‘Lair’ is just as odd looking as my base so maybe they won’t suspect anything.) Ok, but I have to run a few errands first. I will meet you back here in an hour.  
Voltar: Ok see you then.  
Zim quickly leaves.  
Red: He seems nice Voltar.  
Frogg: Voltar didn’t Bugman seem to be acting a little suspicious when you mentioned wanting to see his lair?  
Voltar: Nonsense Frogg. He is just a busy guy.  
Frogg: I still don’t think we should be so quick to trust him.


	2. The Wait of Ultimate Evil Doom!

Zim sneaks around the neighbourhood talking to himself.  
Zim: Few. I finally got away from those wackos! I can’t believe I was about to show them my base. I mean having allies is nice but is it worth possibly compromising my mission?! Well at least I am almost home.  
He sneaks around his yard some before running into his house. Zim’s robot parents jump out of the closet.  
Parents: Welcome home son!  
Gir is watching TV with Mini Moose.  
Zim: Home at last! Now I can fetch the tow vehicle and retrieve my ship.  
Gir, spotting Zim, jumps off the couch towards him.  
Gir: Master I missed you so much!  
Zim looks over at Gir and sees him flying towards him.  
Zim: No Gir! Don’t you dare!  
Zim tries to dodge but it is too late, Gir has him in a firm embrace. Zim struggles to break free of the hug but Gir is like a python.  
Zim: Gir cut it out this instant! Gir!!  
Gir finally obeys. He lets go of Zim and runs away.  
Gir: Wee! I’m running real fast! Look at me go!  
Zim (shaking his head at Gir): That annoying robot!  
Mini Moose squeaks in agreement.  
Zim: Computer! Bring me the Voot-carrier.  
A big purple disc comes out of the ceiling and lands in front of Zim. It hovers a few inches in front of Zim and a pink dome appears on top on of the disc.  
Zim: Computer, disguise the carrier. Something bug related.  
Computer: Processing. Processing!  
Light emits from the carrier as it is transformed into a giant bee.  
Zim: Ingenious! Now if Voltar sees me with the carrier it won’t draw suspicion. Well I am off to fetch my ship but before I go. Mini Moose!  
Mini Moose floats over to Zim.  
Mini Moose: Squeak.  
Zim: Mini Moose, clean up the base while I am gone. I want it to look perfect for when The League of Super Evil arrive.  
Mini Moose: Squeak.  
Zim (mumbling to himself): If only Gir would obey me like you do.  
Zim quickly puts on his contacts and wig before leaving the base with his gigantic bee balloon.

Meanwhile back at the League of Super Evil’s lair…  
Voltar: Frogg! What is taking Bugman so long!!!  
Frogg: Voltar stop whining! He only left five minutes ago!!  
Voltar: I know. It’s just that I want to see his base so bad!  
Frogg: I got that Voltar. It is only like the fifteenth time you’ve said it!!!  
Voltar: What is taking him so long Frogg!  
Frogg gets up from the couch and pulls out some of his hair before heading to his lab to get away from Voltar. Frogg, thinking he is alone, starts mixing some chemicals.  
Voltar: Frogg!! What are you doing?! FROGG! ARE YOU MAKING A TIME MACHINE SO I DON’T HAVE TO WAIT ANY LONGER?! FROGG!?  
Frogg, surprised, drops what he has been mixing onto the floor and his experiment explodes.  
Frogg: Voltar!!  
Frogg looks around for Voltar ready to take a swing at him but he is nowhere to be found. Frogg sighs and starts his experiment over again.


	3. Captured!

Just outside of the Metrotown Park, Zim peers behind the brick wall enclosing the park. To his surprise the park appears deserted.  
Zim: Few. No one noticed my ship.  
Zim continues to walk towards his wrecked ship completely oblivious to the fact that the army is hiding in the bushes watching. Zim reaches the ship and puts it into the recovery vehicle. All the while the army is getting ready to pounce on the General Sergeant’s mark.  
General Sergeant: Now!  
Zim startled looks around franticly while soldiers jump out of the bushes and surround him.  
Zim (Annoyed and confused): What is the meaning of this?!  
General Sergeant: Capture him!  
Two of the soldiers hold Zim down while a third soldier ties him up. All the while Zim struggles.  
Zim: Release me! Release me or suffer the wrath of Zim!  
Soldier one: You are really annoying! Someone get my duct tape pronto.  
Soldier two passes him some duct tape and Soldier one tapes Zim’s mouth.  
Soldier one: That’s better.  
Shortly after Zim is blindfolded, he blacks out.

Back at the lair we see Voltar impatiently awaiting Bugman’s arrival on the couch. He stares at the door eagerly unaware that Zim has been captured and will not be coming.  
Red: Voltar you have been staring at the door for two hours now. I think Bugman lied to you.  
Voltar: Nonsense Red.  
Voltar has a deranged look on his face which is starting to creep Red out. Red starts to say something but he is lost for words. So he closes his mouth and stares at Voltar who continues to stare at the door.

Zim wakes up alone in a cell, he is still in his disguise and the duct tape remains on his mouth. Zim rips the tape off him quickly, in rage. He winces in pain for a bit before accessing his current situation. He feels around his head worried that the army had seen him without his disguise. Much to his relief his wig is still on and as far as he could tell so were his contacts. I wonder why they captured me Zim thought. Do they know I am an alien or was there another reason? Zim sees a guard doing a sweep and quickly tries to get his attention.  
Zim: Hello!!  
The guard turns around to face him.  
Zim: Yes hi. I was wondering why I’m in this cell?  
Guard: I am here to escort you to see the General.  
The Guard opens Zim’s cell and just when Zim is about to make a break for it. He cuffs him.  
Guard: Not so fast little fella.  
Zim struggles and growls at his escort until they reach the General’s office. The guard knocks on the door and announces Zim’s arrival. The guard leaves Zim alone in the office with General Sergeant.  
General Sergeant: Take a seat.  
Zim sits in the chair directly in front of the General. Unfortunately he is way too short for the current arrangement so some phone books are brought in for Zim to sit on.  
Zim: What do you want with me? Why am I here?!  
General Sergeant: Are you the owner of the doomsday bomb we recovered at the park?  
Zim: I don’t know what you are talking about!?  
General Sergeant: The thing your bee ate!  
Zim: Fools! That was no doomsday bomb!  
General Sergeant: Alright then. What was it?  
Zim: It is eh… some alien craft I was taking for parts so I could repair my... Eh… car?  
Zim smiles shyly hoping that the General will believe his dangerously undercooked lie.  
General Sergeant: I know you’re working for Skullossus!  
Zim (Confused): Skull who?  
General Sergeant: Skullossus!  
Zim: Never heard of him.  
General Sergeant: Red suit, skull decals!  
Zim: Oh you must mean Voltar?  
General Sergeant: Voltar?  
The General begins laughing.  
Zim: So if you could just let me go…  
Zim swiftly heads for the door but General Sergeant stops him. The General’s face gets really serious for a second but he soon finds himself cracking up again.  
General Sergeant: Not so fast, one last question. Why are you working for Voltar? He is not even a real villain. His idea of evil is mixing garbage and recycling.  
The General continues laughing.  
Zim: So can I take my stuff and go then?  
General Sergeant: Yeah you seem pretty harmless considering you’re working for that joker. Sorry for the miss understanding.  
The guard from earlier escorts Zim to his giant bee and sends him on his way. Zim gets on the bee and rides it to the League of Super Evil’s lair. He soon arrives in front of his destination and starts to make his way to the front door. Before he can knock an overly eager Voltar opens the door and without so much as looking, he starts talking.  
Voltar: Oh Bugman I knew you would come, my henchmen said you wouldn’t show but I never gave up hope. You’re a little l-  
Voltar looks up and immediately stops talking when he sees Zim. Since he is now wearing his disguise, Voltar doesn’t recognize him.  
Voltar: Wait you’re not Bugman! Who are you?  
Zim (thinking to himself): Oh I forgot. I wasn’t wearing my disguise when we met. I need a cover story.  
Voltar: Don’t just stand their gawking, Answer me!!  
Zim: I just wanted to ah… commemorate you on mixing garbage and recycling. I mean only an evil mastermind could have done such a terrible thing like that.  
Voltar: Finally someone who acknowledges me!  
Zim: Well I got to ah go. Keep up the good work. Bye.  
Voltar closes the door and resumes his position on the couch while Red begins to snore.  
Zim quickly hides behind his giant bee and takes off his disguise. Now in his alien form he walks up to the door once again. Voltar quickly opens it again and repeats the exact same speech as before.  
Zim: So are you ready to see my amazing base?!  
Voltar: Am I?! To the V-Mobile!


	4. The Arrival

Zim leads the way on his bee-mobile while the League of Super Evil follow in their extremely slow V-Mobile.  
Zim: Can’t that thing go any faster?  
Voltar: Can’t that thing go any slower? We can hardly keep up.

After what seemed like forever L.O.S.E. finally arrives at the Zim’s base, unaware that they are being closely monitored by Dib.  
Dib: (Talking to himself) What are you up to Zim?  
He takes out his binoculars and notepad. 

Zim: Ok, we're here. Now quickly into the house, before we are noticed…  
He pauses when he realizes that a few of his neighbours are staring at him along with his newly acquired partners.  
Zim: Hey look, a castle made of meat.  
Everyone looks toward where Zim pointed, even the League of Super Evil.  
Voltar: Where? Where?  
Zim face palms before pushing them into his house before hastily slamming the door. He breathes a sigh of relief.  
Voltar: So Bugman when are you going to take us that meat castle you were talking about?  
Voltar gives Zim the puppy dog eyes. Zim not quite sure what to do, calls for Gir. Gir comes out of the toilet holding a bubble wrapped Mini Moose. Zim looks at Gir annoyed before introducing Gir and Mini Moose to The League of Super Evil.  
Voltar: What is so evil about a moose?  
Zim: Oh you’ll see. Mini Moose!  
Mini Moose: Squeak.  
Zim: Free yourself.  
Mini Moose: Squeak.  
Mini Moose uses his laser eyes to break free of the bubble wrap. Voltar’s jaw drops.  
Voltar: Frogg you need to make us one of those.  
Frogg: *sigh* Sure thing Voltar.


	5. The Tour of Doom!

While L.O.S.E. is distracted, Zim pulls out what appears to be a Tv remote and starts rapidly pressing some of the buttons. The lights go out.  
Voltar: Hey! What's going on?  
In the dark, helmets, much like those seen in door to door, attach to the L.O.S.E.'s heads. The lights come back on and the losers don't suspect a thing.  
Zim: How about that tour?  
Voltar starts to fan girl scream before quickly clasping his hands over his helmet. As Zim shows L.O.S.E. around they see their own version of the best evil lair ever! In Voltar's version it appears that Zim is Voltar's biggest fan. Every room is dedicated to Voltar and there's even a room filled with pictures of Voltar, action figures, wallpaper, as well as a life-sized cardboard cut out! Above the door is plaque that says "The Voltar Awesomeness Room". In Doktor Frogg's version however, there is high tech laboratory equipment everywhere, even more advanced than machinery in Zim's actual lab. Red's version is basically willy wonka. Food everywhere, but with a canine twist. The oompa loompas are talking dogs, and the boat they ride down the chocolate river on, is a giant dog bone. Doomageddon’s version is similar to Red's but with Doomhound Oompa Loompas and meat, lots and lots of meat.  
Once the tour is complete the helmet's disappear and everyone is left flabbergasted.  
Frogg: Voltar, I now understand why you were so eager to come here.


End file.
